For those in the know

Melbourne’s laneways are dotted with atmospheric drinking holes. Tim Richards reports.

ARTHUR’S
Duckboard Place, Melbourne (03) 9654 9744
If a James Bond villain ever designed a glitzy playpad to while away his leisure hours, it’d look like Arthur’s. This roomy alleyway bar is divided up by circular walls with circular viewing holes, allowing you to feel secluded but on top of the action at the same time. Among the modern curves are classic gilt-edged chairs and sofas, producing a striking contrast. A “secret” bar is hidden through a gap at the back, and tasty bar snacks support the excellent cocktails.

ROBOT
12 Bligh Place, Melbourne (03) 9620 3646
This bar bills itself as a Japanese pop culture bar. Red couches and low lights complement toy robots above the bar. Oldfashioned school maps of the islands hang suspended, and Japanese magazines fill racks by the door. There’s Asahi and Sapporo beer available, along with sake (hot or cold), and sushi during the day. Patrons are dressed down, chilling, talking and watching the passing parade. It’s the place to unwind after a long day.

MEYERS PLACE
20 Meyers Place, Melbourne (03) 9650 8609
This is the bar that started the whole hidden laneway thing, and it’s still got what it takes. The recycled timber architecture is subtle, part of the relaxed vibe of the place. Although it gets crowded at times, it always seems a good place for conversation. On warm nights, patrons perch on stools in the quiet alleyway, contemplating the occasional pedestrian taking a short cut to Bourke Street.

DOUBLE HAPPINESS
21 Liverpool Street, Melbourne (03) 9650 4488
On the fringes of Chinatown, this establishment is appropriately themed. The red colour scheme and traditional wall scenes are counterpointed by modern Chinese propaganda posters lining the walls, and stirring Communist icons. Try specialist cocktails like “Dictatorship of the Proletariat” or “Great Leap Forward”, or just settle for a cool Tsingtao beer.

MOO
Driver Lane, Melbourne
This newly-opened watering hole is for those seeking a touch of class in the middle of the shopping district. Next to Myer and across from the GPO, this cafe/bar/restaurant in the basement of the old Money Order Office features cosy booths tucked between solid pillars, comfortable high-backed leather armchairs and an extensive wine list. Its decor features subdued tones, with the area divided by wrought-iron gates. The centre of the bar is also a fine-dining restaurant.

Meyers Place
Photo:Ken Irwin

MURMUR
17 Warburton Lane, Melbourne (03) 9640 0395
This place off Little Bourke Street goes the full “hidden bar” experience: not only do you need to wander down a bin-strewn alleyway, you need to climb some stairs as well. The journey is worth it, yielding a conversation-friendly space in an old warehouse, rope and pulley still intact beneath the timber ceiling. Leather armchairs and sofas sit side-by-side with modern benches and low wooden tables. The cocktail list contains some pleasant variations on the champagne cocktail, and the bar is well-stocked with the range of 42 Below vodkas.

COOKIE
252 Swanston Street, Melbourne (03) 9663 7660
Although this popular bar/restaurant is out of sight above Swanston Street, it’s as far from the intimacy of the tiny laneway bar as it could be. Big and boisterous, this venue is a modern take on the beer hall, with numerous international brews available. It’s also a restaurant serving Thai-inspired food. The lofty, mirrored-pillar space seems to inspire lively conversation and it’s nearly always busy. With balconies overlooking the street, and a cosy secondary bar out the back, this is a great place to kick a big night off.

ST JEROME’S
7 Caledonian Place, Melbourne
If you feel intimidated by bars with ritzy leather sofas, chandeliers and cocktails with movie-ticket price tags, St Jerome’s is the place to be. Squeezed into a former Swiss cafe in a dingy laneway next to Myer, this drinking hole is as downbeat as you can get. The tiny bar, serving beer, wine and spirits, is bedecked with retro pictures and daggy decor. The loading bay courtyard continues the theme with old couches and concrete walls. Somehow, it works beautifully, producing a laid-back vibe and a friendly but buzzy crowd.

TONY STARR’S KITTEN CLUB
267 Little Collins Street, Melbourne (03) 9650 2448
This is a venue with something for everyone. At the front there’s a bar overlooking Little Collins Street, with comfortable chairs and padded benches in a compact but friendly space. At the back there’s a small dining area, serving up interesting Asian-inspired meals. The bar snacks are no afterthought either, with clever variations on the usual such as kumara chips. Upstairs is a performance area which hosts live music and the occasional comedy show.

THE CROFT INSTITUTE
21 Croft Alley, Melbourne (03) 9671 4399
Tucked away in deepest, darkest Chinatown, this establishment is approached via a long alleyway. At the end is a high-ceilinged bar decked out in scientific gear. Beakers and retorts gleam within glass cases, the bar is a lab bench with gas jets, and bar stools line tables with utilitarian sinks. It’s an energetic, chatty place which often fills up on weekend evenings, though earlier in the week it can be quiet. There’s also a second bar upstairs, which hosts DJs. If you want the ultimate in hidden bars you can impress your friends with, this is it.